Day 20: Start a Gratitude Journal | A Meaningful Existence

Gratitude journaling is one of the best-known exercises in positive psychology, and one of the simplest. Today you'll start one.

What the research says

In a well-known 2003 study, psychologists Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough asked participants to write weekly about either things they were grateful for, daily hassles or neutral events. After ten weeks, the gratitude group felt better about their lives as a whole and were more optimistic about the coming week than the comparison groups. They also reported exercising more and fewer physical symptoms.

A few years later, Martin Seligman and colleagues tested a simple version called "three good things": each night for a week, write down three things that went well and why. Participants who did this reported being happier and less depressed for months afterwards compared with a placebo exercise, though the effects were modest.

Later research has been more mixed, with some reviews finding smaller effects than early studies suggested. It's not a cure for depression or a substitute for treatment. But as low-cost habits go, it's one of the better-supported ones.

How to do it

Tonight, before bed, write down three things that went well today. They can be tiny:

"The sun came out during my lunch break."
"My daughter told me a joke that made me laugh."
"I finished the report I'd been dreading."

Then, for at least one of them, write a sentence about why it happened. "The report got finished because I blocked out the morning and turned off email." The "why" is important. It helps you notice your own part in good things, as well as what others did for you.

You can use a notebook, an app or our gratitude journal tool, which keeps entries privately in your browser.

Keep it fresh

The biggest risk with gratitude journaling is that it becomes a routine list: "family, health, home" every night. That's when it stops working. To keep it meaningful:

Be specific. Not "my partner" but "my partner made me a coffee before I asked."
Look for new things. Try to write at least one thing you've never written before.
Include people. Notice what others have done for you.
Savour the moment. As you write, take a few seconds to remember how it felt.

How often?

Some research suggests that writing a few times a week can feel fresher than writing every single day. Experiment. If daily entries start to feel like a chore, switch to two or three times a week.

When it feels hard

On a bad day, finding three good things can feel impossible or even insulting. That's normal. On those days, it's fine to write one very small thing ("I got through it", "the tea was hot") or to skip it. Gratitude works best as a gentle invitation, not an obligation to feel happy.

Gratitude grows when it's shared. Once in a while, tell the person you wrote about. It connects nicely with day 7, saying thank you.

Today's challenge

Write down three good things from today and why one of them happened. If you enjoy it, try it for the next week and see how you feel.

Sources and further reading

Questions people ask

Paper or app for a gratitude journal?

Either works. Paper can feel more reflective and keeps you off your phone at bedtime; an app or our browser-based journal is always to hand. Choose whichever you're most likely to open three times a week.