The Best Piece of Advice: How to Find, Test and Use Good Advice

Ask people about the best advice they've ever received and you'll hear all sorts of answers: a grandparent's simple rule, a teacher's offhand comment, a boss's honest feedback, a stranger's words at exactly the right time. Some advice changes lives. Most is forgotten.

This page sits at an address that originally asked about one person's best advice. Here we look at what makes advice valuable, how to find it and how to use it.

Why we ignore good advice

Research on advice-taking, reviewed by Silvia Bonaccio and Reeshad Dalal in 2006, has found that people often give less weight to advice than they should, a pattern sometimes called egocentric discounting. We tend to trust our own judgement more than others', partly because we know our own reasons but not always theirs.

That's not always bad; advice can be wrong. But it means we sometimes miss useful insights.

What makes advice good

Good advice tends to:

Be specific. "Send one follow-up email a week after an interview" is more useful than "be persistent".
Come from relevant experience. Someone who's done what you're attempting, or who knows you well.
Fit your situation. Advice that worked for someone else may not suit your circumstances, values or personality.
Be honest. The most valuable advice is sometimes uncomfortable.
Be testable. You can try it and see if it works.

How to find good advice

Ask the right people

Seek out people who have relevant experience and care about you. Our article on learning from people who've done it has tips.

Ask specific questions

Instead of "any advice?", ask "what's the biggest mistake people make when starting out?" or "what would you do in my position?"

Listen without defending

When someone gives advice, resist the urge to explain why it won't work. Listen, ask questions and take time to consider it.

Collect it

Keep a note of advice that resonates. Over time, you'll build a personal collection to revisit.

How to use advice

Consider the source. Do they have relevant experience? Do they understand your situation?
Check it against your values. Does it fit who you are and what matters to you?
Test it. Try it in a small way and see what happens.
Adapt it. Modify advice to suit your circumstances.
Reflect. Did it help? What did you learn?

Classic advice worth considering

Some advice appears across many cultures and generations, and is worth testing for yourself:

Treat others as you'd like to be treated. Versions of this principle appear in many religious and ethical traditions.
Pay yourself first. Save before you spend.
Sleep on big decisions.
Listen more than you speak.
Do the hardest task first.
When in doubt, be kind.
Start before you feel ready.

None is a universal law, but each has helped many people.

Pass it on

When you find advice that works, share it. Mentoring, teaching or simply passing on a helpful insight can make a difference in someone else's life. See are you ready to learn or to teach today?.

Try this

Write down the best piece of advice you've ever received. Why did it matter? Then ask three people about the best advice they've received, and add any that resonate to your collection.

Sources and further reading

Bonaccio & Dalal (2006), Advice taking and decision-making: an integrative literature review, Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes

Questions people ask

How do I give good advice?

Ask questions first so you understand the situation, share what worked for you rather than what someone must do, and respect their right to decide differently.